My name is Buffer.... The Proud Buffer

Hello, my name is Buffer.  I am the middle man between what the world can introduce into my home and my children's life at too early of an age. I protect my kids from the expectations of our friends, family, well meaning onlookers, myself and my husband.  I cannot protect them at school but I attempt to always be present in their day through a note in the backpack, a freshly washed sheet for nap time, a smile when I am able to drop off and pick up them up from school. 

I try to buffer my babies from the stress of two parents who work full time and despite best efforts cannot always erase the distance that is created because of our roles outside of the home.  I attempt to reassure that "normal" is different in every home and every childhood. I balance the explanations of why "Anna" has two mommies or daddies, why "Evan" has an iPhone because his parents don't talk to each other anymore and he needs the phone to play the adult in an ugly divorce.  

I try to not place judgement on people or situations.  When it comes to dealing with mean people we encounter I lead with, God loves them, you don't have to and close with a wink to give some levity to the subject.  Life is complicated, hard and can get ugly the older we become so I try to protect my kids from what I can now to let them be kids.  

My buffering skills are not without flaw, I am not perfect.  The job is thankless and hard and stressful.  It is but for the Grace of God I would have given up on it already because between school, the Disney Channel, magazines and the lyrics of most songs on the radio it seems like a hopeless exercise.  It is my prayer but that perhaps I have caught just enough to help them sleep a little more sound at night.  

Yesterday, my oldest and I were doing our nails.  She is nearly seven so it is almost a fun activity to do with her.  We were sprawled on the floor in my large bathroom (tile is easier to clean in case of spills and she is still seven so there are always a few) and the TV was on in the bedroom just outside of our make shift nail salon.  We have speakers in the bathroom so we can listen to the news in the morning while getting ready and yesterday the speakers were still on to share the sound from the bedroom TV to the bathroom.  My husband is addicted to investigative TV shows like Dateline and other real life who- done-it type shows about murders.  He left the TV on the network that dedicates their airtime 24/7 to that kind of stuff.  I had not even noticed the audio but my daughter did.  She said, "this type of TV gives me nightmares".  I had to stop and listen to hear what she was talking about and before I could say anything she got up walked into the bedroom and turned the TV off.  

She walked back in and sat back down and started painting her toes again.  "Well, you took care of that!" I said with a smile.  She smirked back (the smirk she inherited from me) and said, "when we don't like something we can choose to change it".  I asked where she got so smart and her response will live in my heart forever.... "from you mommy.  That's what you say".

Buffer. Mommy. whatever you want to call me just know to add the word "Proud" in front of what ever that is....